I am drinking red wine today. I have been home all day. Mrs A wants dinner when she arrives here in less than forty minutes. I am currently drinking a napa valley cab. 2006 silver oak. It is a delicious wine.
I am on the second bottle and maybe I have drank to much but my stew will be marvelous. I want Mrs A to be happy. I think she wants to see her boy toy but she did not talk about this. We talk about all play before not after. I still wonder if she changed things. I still will cook the beef stew and drink the wine. I hope she is having a grand time.
I want fucked badly. I want to make her happy badly. It is crazy when you drink wine all day how your mind messes with you.
Much love. I hope all is well with you all.
Much Love
Me
What life does as you try and support the women in your life.
Monday, November 30, 2015
Sunday, November 29, 2015
Sissygasm not accomplished but orgasm was achieved.
Today I spent the day on the ski hill. This was my second trip to our local place. I took the kids and we had a lovely time. Mrs A was free to do whatever she wants. When we arrived home she was gone. Hmmm My mind is a racing...
Mrs A on Friday cornered me in the laundry room. I was busy with some clean up as the house was full of kids from college. Mrs A pushed up on my from behind. She reached around and massaged her cock. Mrs A whispered in to my ear.
"I see you have been good and my cock wants to take this lovely ass. Be ready to service me tonight and if you are good I will finished with a nice sissygasm for you."
I was ecstatic. It has been about a month sense she has fucked me with her strap on. I so miss it. I would have her do that as much as she wants and she does... haha. Every day is to much to ask I guess.
So, that night I was ready. She dressed in a new outfit I got her. Black silk ruffled panties and bra with black stockings. She spoke in my ear as she edged my cock. Saying if I serve her well she will fuck me like I need.
I jumped right in. orgasm after orgasm. Mrs A has no problems coming. I forget how many she had but once she hits a threshold she wants cock. She took mine inside her and road hard. I told her I was about to come. She said to do it. I knew once this happened she would end the night without fucking me. I was so torn. I hate that. But I came as I debated on this.
So The night ended with tons of Mrs A pleasure. Mine was amazing too but felt unfinished, ah the life of a submissive. I did get to cuddle with her for a long time though...
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
Cuckold.
My post earlier today was actual yesterdays. It appears I kept it as a draft until today. haha
So today I want to talk about cuckolding.
Mrs A has a current lover who she sees when she want. I actually am unaware if he knows I know or that I am usually home waiting. Mrs A likes to share most of the details of their relationship but reserve much of it to herself and her lover. They do have a private relationship that I am not part of.
I struggle with this at times. I feel much better when all parties are open and are clear on the roles they play. I do think there is a variety of ways of cuckolding that many people do. Every couple has to find what is right for them. I do know ours has changed over time.
I found with some of our play partners in the past they would talk about me and would assume things about me because of the kinks that get me off. It is amazing how people need to label or categorize certain things about you. They want to fit you in a box. Oh you like feminization and being fucked by men so you're a sissy. So you will like this and this. Sometimes I hate what they think I would love.
Learning to role with this and see Mrs A and I grounded in our love is that matters. That helps pull us though some of this stuff we are willing to challenge ourselves with. Mrs A has pushed me a lot recently with feminine things. She likes me in a nightie. She loves talking to me with it on.
I am a bottom and love being submissive to another man and pleasuring them. My dream would be to find a male lover that is comfortable with both Mrs A and I as lovers. To know that we are both fuckable whenever he feels like that. That his sexual needs can be met in so many different ways. That he would want those on a regular bases. That kind of cuckolding I could get into.. haha
Mrs A always tells me that she may send me out to please others. It is her body and she will use it as she wants. Currently Mrs A only has her one lover and it makes her happy. In the end that is what matters.
So today I want to talk about cuckolding.
Mrs A has a current lover who she sees when she want. I actually am unaware if he knows I know or that I am usually home waiting. Mrs A likes to share most of the details of their relationship but reserve much of it to herself and her lover. They do have a private relationship that I am not part of.
I struggle with this at times. I feel much better when all parties are open and are clear on the roles they play. I do think there is a variety of ways of cuckolding that many people do. Every couple has to find what is right for them. I do know ours has changed over time.
I found with some of our play partners in the past they would talk about me and would assume things about me because of the kinks that get me off. It is amazing how people need to label or categorize certain things about you. They want to fit you in a box. Oh you like feminization and being fucked by men so you're a sissy. So you will like this and this. Sometimes I hate what they think I would love.
Learning to role with this and see Mrs A and I grounded in our love is that matters. That helps pull us though some of this stuff we are willing to challenge ourselves with. Mrs A has pushed me a lot recently with feminine things. She likes me in a nightie. She loves talking to me with it on.
I am a bottom and love being submissive to another man and pleasuring them. My dream would be to find a male lover that is comfortable with both Mrs A and I as lovers. To know that we are both fuckable whenever he feels like that. That his sexual needs can be met in so many different ways. That he would want those on a regular bases. That kind of cuckolding I could get into.. haha
Mrs A always tells me that she may send me out to please others. It is her body and she will use it as she wants. Currently Mrs A only has her one lover and it makes her happy. In the end that is what matters.
This looks so fun!
Orgasm denial.
I am interested in hearing from people about what they get out of denying orgasms to their submissive. I am talking in a female lead situation. I see many post about how denying male orgasms make him more attentive, more submissive, more controllable. I just do not see that.
I do think orgasm control is important. Giving my orgasms up to Mrs A has been amazingly freeing to my brain. To know that Mrs A is totally in control of my sexual pleasure is awesome. I know it comes with worries and fears and excitement but it is also freeing. I am now free to think of ways to service her. I am free to focus on making her happy. In return she takes the responsibility of my sexual pleasure to heart. She does not ignore me. She does not brush me off. She talks to me about how she feels about it, what she is thinking, how she wants something a specific way. Then there are times she just surprises me. I like the mix of it. They are her orgasms and I guess to teach a lesson she can deny me on that purpose alone or deny me as a form of punishment. It is in her control.
Mrs A really is still emotionally tied to her ability to sexually arouse and please me. She says it makes her feel desired and sexually wanted. Mrs A likes seeing objective data that I do love, lust and desire her. She knows I shower her with praise and service in non sexual ways.
I have not had to waited more than 3 weeks to have an orgasm for her. It could come in a variety of ways. ruined, caged, from her fucking me to more the traditional ways. Many times it is life getting in the way, as much as her denying me. Mrs A would take me to the wood shed if she ever felt my orgasms make me less attentive.
Her most favorite game is to have me pleasure her over and over while indirectly having my erect cock rub on her leg, hip, feet. She loves seeing my body start to pour out pre-cum and have mini orgasms is the best way to explain it.
Last night I was allowed to giver her orgasm after orgasm with my hands only. She wanted to look me in the eye as she came. She loved even choking me as she came. Seeing my response to her pleasure was important. When we finished Mrs A said what was the most sexual for her was feeling all the pre cum covering the back of her leg.
After we finished playing she likes to then climb on top of me and straddle my cock. She did this last night. She sits down on it slowly and pushes as deep as she can and then stops moving. Mrs A takes my face in her hands and gets real close and starts to say come for me. She teases me about remembering her orgasms in my mind, how she felt, how she looked. She then says come for me. If I come with no movements she then rewards me by fucking me hard then. It drives me crazy. If I do not come after 5 minutes or so she climbs off and says I was not focused enough on her pleasure.
This is maybe a little different way of control and denial but it is still exactly that. The other way she takes big pleasure in having me come is when she fucks me. She wants to see me come from her penetration only. Soft or erect she fucks me until I come. She loves that too. Makes her want to call me a good gurl!
Me
I do think orgasm control is important. Giving my orgasms up to Mrs A has been amazingly freeing to my brain. To know that Mrs A is totally in control of my sexual pleasure is awesome. I know it comes with worries and fears and excitement but it is also freeing. I am now free to think of ways to service her. I am free to focus on making her happy. In return she takes the responsibility of my sexual pleasure to heart. She does not ignore me. She does not brush me off. She talks to me about how she feels about it, what she is thinking, how she wants something a specific way. Then there are times she just surprises me. I like the mix of it. They are her orgasms and I guess to teach a lesson she can deny me on that purpose alone or deny me as a form of punishment. It is in her control.
Mrs A really is still emotionally tied to her ability to sexually arouse and please me. She says it makes her feel desired and sexually wanted. Mrs A likes seeing objective data that I do love, lust and desire her. She knows I shower her with praise and service in non sexual ways.
I have not had to waited more than 3 weeks to have an orgasm for her. It could come in a variety of ways. ruined, caged, from her fucking me to more the traditional ways. Many times it is life getting in the way, as much as her denying me. Mrs A would take me to the wood shed if she ever felt my orgasms make me less attentive.
Her most favorite game is to have me pleasure her over and over while indirectly having my erect cock rub on her leg, hip, feet. She loves seeing my body start to pour out pre-cum and have mini orgasms is the best way to explain it.
Last night I was allowed to giver her orgasm after orgasm with my hands only. She wanted to look me in the eye as she came. She loved even choking me as she came. Seeing my response to her pleasure was important. When we finished Mrs A said what was the most sexual for her was feeling all the pre cum covering the back of her leg.
After we finished playing she likes to then climb on top of me and straddle my cock. She did this last night. She sits down on it slowly and pushes as deep as she can and then stops moving. Mrs A takes my face in her hands and gets real close and starts to say come for me. She teases me about remembering her orgasms in my mind, how she felt, how she looked. She then says come for me. If I come with no movements she then rewards me by fucking me hard then. It drives me crazy. If I do not come after 5 minutes or so she climbs off and says I was not focused enough on her pleasure.
This is maybe a little different way of control and denial but it is still exactly that. The other way she takes big pleasure in having me come is when she fucks me. She wants to see me come from her penetration only. Soft or erect she fucks me until I come. She loves that too. Makes her want to call me a good gurl!
Me
Thursday, November 19, 2015
desire verse reality
My ideal submissive relationship is one where Mrs A owns and takes as many orgasms as she wants. That she uses me as an object that helps achieve this goal. At the same time she then limits or controls when I have an orgasm.
SO, I should have not told her that. She has been limiting my orgasms plenty. BUT she limits me giving her orgasms too if I am not a good boy. She also puts requirements on me too. This has not been fun. It is the worst punishment to give me and I hate it. I rather be spanked, caged, anything really.
I am sitting here today feeling like I am caged and been disciplined. I have not had an orgasm in 4 days. I have also not been able to give Mrs A one. She flirts with her boy toy and I assume finding ways to pleasure herself. All I am unaware of. It is iconic in light of just a few days ago we almost achieved 5 sexual play events in 24 hours. Now total drought.
I have to get better results in my hockey play to get an orgasm. This is troublesome but fun!
me
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
Neighbors.
I was recently invited to go on a day trip to participate in winter sports. I was invited by a friend who has a huge crush on Mrs A. He is nothing but a gentleman most of the times.
At some parties when we have free flowing wine he has flirted with Mrs A. It is fun to watch. His wife is one of those women who dreamt of the white picket fence and perfect gentleman husband that never strays. She loves the traditional roles and wants nothing to change that. She will never take charge in the bedroom or explore sexual things.
Now my friend is a classic man who craves a dominant women to ravage him. Hee has those mischief eyes that wants to push into many venues sexually. He is drawn to Mrs A sensual dominant nature at times. He is like a moth drawn to a flame. What fun it is to watch.
Well, Mrs A teased me about me having a boy crush on him. I do, my bi side does come out a little. I told her we should do a little challenge. I can say yes to this day trip and go or.... I can say Mrs A is free and would love to go but I cannot.
Mrs A says no. Mainly because she knows who he would pick. All I can say is I would be at home on said date. haha We are way to close of friends to do any of that. To them all we want is a white picket fence too, well at least the illusion. My friend senses his own kind in us.
Me
At some parties when we have free flowing wine he has flirted with Mrs A. It is fun to watch. His wife is one of those women who dreamt of the white picket fence and perfect gentleman husband that never strays. She loves the traditional roles and wants nothing to change that. She will never take charge in the bedroom or explore sexual things.
Now my friend is a classic man who craves a dominant women to ravage him. Hee has those mischief eyes that wants to push into many venues sexually. He is drawn to Mrs A sensual dominant nature at times. He is like a moth drawn to a flame. What fun it is to watch.
Well, Mrs A teased me about me having a boy crush on him. I do, my bi side does come out a little. I told her we should do a little challenge. I can say yes to this day trip and go or.... I can say Mrs A is free and would love to go but I cannot.
Mrs A says no. Mainly because she knows who he would pick. All I can say is I would be at home on said date. haha We are way to close of friends to do any of that. To them all we want is a white picket fence too, well at least the illusion. My friend senses his own kind in us.
Me
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
Last night
I have been in a funk this week related to a very poor performance on the ice Sunday. Mrs A has a big presentation at work on Thursday that she is working on this week. So we have been low in our normal interactions. I feel like I have been a bit neglectful. She reminded me last night in the most positive way about my duties.
Earlier in the day we had joked about having sex five times in a day. Talking about how this was something we did in our younger days. We received one of the many orders I had placed from my previous assignments yesterday, it is the retro looking bra and panty with a robe.
So once bedtime came around Mrs A changed into her new lingerie, while we were both working on the said above items. Mrs A informed me that she wanted me in a silk feminine robe out of the blue so I complied. Mrs A in yellow and red flowery lingerie and I in a silk black kimono sitting in our bed together, both focused on our computer screens.
I noticed Mrs A had started to caress herself. She would lightly touch her neck, chest, and waist. The softness and delicate aspects of my silk robe rubbing on my skin caused me to think more sensual things.
Mrs A then asked me ,rather nonchalantly, how many orgasms did I think she needed tonight. I was stunned and unsure what to say. It was actually taking a while for my brain to process this from the skating drills I was reading about. I pondered what to say. A cheap way out would be to say however many she wants, or an over the top answer and say thousands. SO, After taking a while before I answered, I turned to her and said four.
She smiled at me and said I can give her one with each hand, one with my mouth and one with her cock. She wanted me stay in my kimono. I dove to work at full speed to achieve these orgasm goals. I was so happy to be pleasing her. To see her body respond to my touch, to my lips was amazing. I so enjoy getting lost in her pleasure.
It ended with both of us orgasming. We then cuddled and tried to fall asleep. I held her for a long time as is our routine. I then moved to my side of the bed,Mrs A does not like to be touched when she is actually sleeping. As I laid there I felt her move her foot under mine. This does not happen normally. I wondered what was up but kept trying to fall asleep. Finally I turned to look at her and Mrs A was caressing and pinching her bared left nipple.
That was all the signal I needed. I attacked her and gave her more orgasms with my mouth and hands until she could not stand it. She squirted all over our bed. Towels were needed. Mrs A never feels completely satisfied without being fucked by a cock. So we ended this session once again with me taking her from behind.
We collapsed and finally fell asleep on a well used bed. The fun thing of it all as my alarm awoke us. Mrs A was ready to go again. This time it was quick, she got on top and road her cock until she came. Then Mrs A kicked me out of her bed and sent me to my trainer.
I smile sitting here today at work. What a wonderful few hours we have had and we are only two short on achieving the five times a day thing... Something, I think, to be proud of at our age...
I have my fingers crossed.
Me
Earlier in the day we had joked about having sex five times in a day. Talking about how this was something we did in our younger days. We received one of the many orders I had placed from my previous assignments yesterday, it is the retro looking bra and panty with a robe.
So once bedtime came around Mrs A changed into her new lingerie, while we were both working on the said above items. Mrs A informed me that she wanted me in a silk feminine robe out of the blue so I complied. Mrs A in yellow and red flowery lingerie and I in a silk black kimono sitting in our bed together, both focused on our computer screens.
I noticed Mrs A had started to caress herself. She would lightly touch her neck, chest, and waist. The softness and delicate aspects of my silk robe rubbing on my skin caused me to think more sensual things.
Mrs A then asked me ,rather nonchalantly, how many orgasms did I think she needed tonight. I was stunned and unsure what to say. It was actually taking a while for my brain to process this from the skating drills I was reading about. I pondered what to say. A cheap way out would be to say however many she wants, or an over the top answer and say thousands. SO, After taking a while before I answered, I turned to her and said four.
She smiled at me and said I can give her one with each hand, one with my mouth and one with her cock. She wanted me stay in my kimono. I dove to work at full speed to achieve these orgasm goals. I was so happy to be pleasing her. To see her body respond to my touch, to my lips was amazing. I so enjoy getting lost in her pleasure.
It ended with both of us orgasming. We then cuddled and tried to fall asleep. I held her for a long time as is our routine. I then moved to my side of the bed,Mrs A does not like to be touched when she is actually sleeping. As I laid there I felt her move her foot under mine. This does not happen normally. I wondered what was up but kept trying to fall asleep. Finally I turned to look at her and Mrs A was caressing and pinching her bared left nipple.
That was all the signal I needed. I attacked her and gave her more orgasms with my mouth and hands until she could not stand it. She squirted all over our bed. Towels were needed. Mrs A never feels completely satisfied without being fucked by a cock. So we ended this session once again with me taking her from behind.
We collapsed and finally fell asleep on a well used bed. The fun thing of it all as my alarm awoke us. Mrs A was ready to go again. This time it was quick, she got on top and road her cock until she came. Then Mrs A kicked me out of her bed and sent me to my trainer.
I smile sitting here today at work. What a wonderful few hours we have had and we are only two short on achieving the five times a day thing... Something, I think, to be proud of at our age...
I have my fingers crossed.
Me
Sunday, November 15, 2015
My Duty
The last few days have been full. A big birthday party one night and a MMA fight/going away party the next. I was not able to do many service oriented things for Mrs A. I also was not able to exercise as much as I wanted. So today I was expecting Mrs A to exert a little more control. She needs it as much as I.
So I sit here in panties watching Penny Dreadful and awaiting Mrs A. She went out for brunch and pedicures with her girlfriends. Mrs A placed I in panties before she left. She started this process by meeting me stepping out of the shower. I was dripping wet and she told me to turn and face the wall. I did.
She then had me place my hands on the wall and to not move. She then rubbed lotion all over me. Mrs A then turned me around and sucked on her cock while looking in my eye. She teased me like that for a while then had me lay on the bed.
She climbed onto her cock and road it until she came. She then started to speak about the fact I was not allowed to come today. That she will be needing her cock ready at any moment today to satisfy her needs. She feels that if I come I would be useless to her. She then road my face until she came again. Talking all the time about her needs come first and that I was not to come today. I was not allowed to touch her cock. That her cock should be in panties all day.
Then she sat next to me straddling my torso and made me finger her until she came a third time. Talking of her plans for the day. She debated about putting her cock in chastity. She made me promise to not to touch her cock. Mrs a settled on panties, but told me to lock her cock up if the temptation was to great. Then she dressed and off she went to spend time with the ladies.
So here I sit. panties on, watching Penny Dreadful awaiting her call for service to ring in my ears.
Me.
Thursday, November 12, 2015
Who does not like women in lingerie!
My assignment by Mrs A 2 days ago was to look for some casual lingerie that she can spend time in. She wants it to reflect how I view her. No dominatrix stuff, we have tons. The goal in these purchases was to allow her to feel beautiful and also be functional. She wanted to make sure she was covered enough if kids or let say UPS man came to the door.
Some assignments as a submissive are way more fun than others. It is not that the kitchen does not get cleaned to a standard. But this assignment I may go a little over board. I told her last night that I feel this should be an ongoing assignment. Who would not want to spend endless time online looking at lingerie from around the world. Seeing all those pretty things and imagining Mrs A in them makes for a pleasant time.
Mrs A is having a struggle with work. It is taking up a lot of her mental space. Being supportive is all I can do. But no orgasm for Mrs A or me in a couple days. I start to feel on edge the longer it goes without her having some pleasure. So this assignment helps divert my energy.
I felt maybe sharing some of my finds. All of these will be in Mrs A closet soon. I hope they make you feel better too.
Some assignments as a submissive are way more fun than others. It is not that the kitchen does not get cleaned to a standard. But this assignment I may go a little over board. I told her last night that I feel this should be an ongoing assignment. Who would not want to spend endless time online looking at lingerie from around the world. Seeing all those pretty things and imagining Mrs A in them makes for a pleasant time.
Mrs A is having a struggle with work. It is taking up a lot of her mental space. Being supportive is all I can do. But no orgasm for Mrs A or me in a couple days. I start to feel on edge the longer it goes without her having some pleasure. So this assignment helps divert my energy.
I felt maybe sharing some of my finds. All of these will be in Mrs A closet soon. I hope they make you feel better too.
From Secret in Lace: This is maybe a little retro but I want to see how it looks on her.
From Dessus Dessus: I hope it is coverage enough for her to lounge in.
From Journelle: There is matching panties.
From Dessus Dessus The shorts and top together and the flowery lace has a kimono and panties.
From Ayten Gasson: We have this along with french panties in black with a matching bra.
From Bluebella: The Bra has matching panties. Mrs A is a DD on top so the chemise here at the bottom my be the wrong cut but we will see.
This is from Claire Pettibone: Lace and embroidered flowers. Top and the bottom.
This is my favorite. I had wished for many more options from this store. But I will watch closely for new options.
I am also in love with Guia La Bruna
If she was still making lingerie I would be all over it. But she has moved on to swim wear.
I can dream though.
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
Mrs A in the morning
I did not wake soon enough to make Mrs A coffee. She was ok with it. I had a late game that went until 12:30 AM. I then had to be at work. I did receive my assignment for the day. I am excited since I get to buy her things. But Mrs A sent me a gift on my phone today too. I would like to share.
How she spent her morning.
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
If your gonna ride, ride the white pony!
After my work out, I came home and got ready for the day. Mrs A had told me that yesterday I had all day to seduce her and did not. She informed me I could have dressed sexy for her like panties or something feminine. I could have offered many times to give her orgasms. I did not. I, at times, worry I might come across as if I am "topping from the bottom." I regret a whole day of lost opportunities.
So, today I shaved, lotion up, and put on some french cut panties. I sent a picture to Mrs A to let her know my choice as required. She returned home from her training session and immediately had me dance for her in my panties. She then made me bend over the bed and she caressed me and told me how hot I was. She talked of the things she wanted to do to me. She then started to finger fuck my ass. All this while biting my neck and at times rubbing my cock in its panties.
After a while of that she made me lay down and she climbed on top of her cock . She keep riding until she had two orgasms. She would not allow me to come. She stop or get of completely and lay there. She then climb back on and ride for a while going fast slow or at her desire. She would rub her own clit in front of me at times too. She would choke me, slap me, bite me, talk to me about how I am just a possession to be used at her whim. I was happy as a sub could be...
Then all a sudden you could tell she had made a decision. I was worried this would end as a nice edging session. Bless her it was not! She leaned forward and put her elbows into my chest hard and grabbed my face on each side. She pulled me within inches of her face and started to ride me like a horse on a dead run. She came at least once but kept going until she saw me about to come. At the time she rode harder and harder. I came as hard and long as I have ever before, but she would not stop. Still staring me in the eyes she kept at it. I could not handle it. She did not care. Finally she came again and stopped.
I had the most empty brain of my life. I felt weak and had a slight tremor. I was so happy inside. I could not speak or think. She sat up still never breaking eye contact. She would not move with me still inside her. She began to trace over my chest with her sharp nails. Then all f a sudden she jumped off and left me there... Alone, naked except for my panties that she kept on the whole time, smiling ear to ear.
This is how my morning started. I hope yours goes as well as mine.
Me
Monday, November 9, 2015
Sunday, November 8, 2015
Touch myself assignment
Mrs A has assigned me this week a 5 minute a day erotic, sensual caress of my own body. I am not allowed to touch my cock though. She has told me she will pick the days she wants to directly observe me touch myself. Mrs A is trying to help me love my body. I have aways had a love hate relationship with it.
So I am on day 4 of this assignment and the first 2 days went well. I did it alone and was surprised how my body responded to my own caress. Every time I get a slight erection and my nipples would become more hard. I feel a tingle overly body and up my spine. I was happy thinking she forgot I would have to preform this act in front of her until yesterday, I receive a text that there will be a direct observed event last night.
The idea of preforming for Mrs A is arousing to me but also embarrassing. I find it ironic that women will preform sensual acts like this all the time in front of men. This role reversal in front of me and I am feeling all the insecurities of a Sub. Mrs A knows all to well how to push my buttons.
So, with all the fret, worry and excitement washing over me, I was able to do it. It went great and as always I was rewarded with giving Mrs A a few orgasms. She allowed me to cum inside her too. What an amazing night for us both.
So what acts does your dominate make you do in front of them? Do they make you preform all exposed to others? I wonder what experiences others have with this?
Mrs A placed me in panties today because I was so pretty touching myself last night. She likes when her cock is covered with lace.
Me
So I am on day 4 of this assignment and the first 2 days went well. I did it alone and was surprised how my body responded to my own caress. Every time I get a slight erection and my nipples would become more hard. I feel a tingle overly body and up my spine. I was happy thinking she forgot I would have to preform this act in front of her until yesterday, I receive a text that there will be a direct observed event last night.
The idea of preforming for Mrs A is arousing to me but also embarrassing. I find it ironic that women will preform sensual acts like this all the time in front of men. This role reversal in front of me and I am feeling all the insecurities of a Sub. Mrs A knows all to well how to push my buttons.
So, with all the fret, worry and excitement washing over me, I was able to do it. It went great and as always I was rewarded with giving Mrs A a few orgasms. She allowed me to cum inside her too. What an amazing night for us both.
So what acts does your dominate make you do in front of them? Do they make you preform all exposed to others? I wonder what experiences others have with this?
Mrs A placed me in panties today because I was so pretty touching myself last night. She likes when her cock is covered with lace.
Me
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Ladies night out!
I was put in charge of bring food home for the family. I had just finished a long day at work and was informed that there would be a "ladies" night for Mrs A. So after a long discussion with 2 teenage girls a decision on what food was accomplished. I arrived in due time with said food and had an enjoyable dinner with two very special kids.
I am currently doing a six day run at work so I was tired and happy Mrs A found people to have fun with. I did experience an intense sense of longing and jealously. I know it comes from being selfish. I have become addicted to arriving home and feeling Mrs A embrace and sharing time in the her space. I knew I was going to fall asleep alone and all I could think of was the lost opportunity of being with her. At the same time I was so happy for her night out. I loved all the scenarios that ran through my head. The probability of some crazy sexual encounter was slim but it still ran though my mind. I also wondered if she would see her recent love interest. It was arousing but scary to me to think these things. What I did know was she was free to do what she may.
To be totally honest in the past I would have probably done m fatherly duties and spend time with the kids. Most of our kids are in college now, I have less demand there. After that I would retire to my room where I would watch a movie or sports. Once I was bored enough I would cruise the internet watch some porn and end up masturbating. Now that I cannot do this without Mrs A permission it changes things. She makes it clear at this point in time she wants to be involved with every orgasm I have.
So last night I played a little gears of war on my xbox and obsessed over Mrs A. I then cleaned the bathroom and the kitchen. I tidy up the dog kennel and then tried to settle in for sleep. It would not come. My mind and routine was gone. I know if I had masturbated I would have been able to sleep. But obeying Mrs A was more important. So sleep finally came at 1 a.m. and it was restless.
I did not know when Mrs A crawled into bed but she was there. Her coffee placed on her night stand, when I left for work. I cannot wait to hear about her night.
Me
I am currently doing a six day run at work so I was tired and happy Mrs A found people to have fun with. I did experience an intense sense of longing and jealously. I know it comes from being selfish. I have become addicted to arriving home and feeling Mrs A embrace and sharing time in the her space. I knew I was going to fall asleep alone and all I could think of was the lost opportunity of being with her. At the same time I was so happy for her night out. I loved all the scenarios that ran through my head. The probability of some crazy sexual encounter was slim but it still ran though my mind. I also wondered if she would see her recent love interest. It was arousing but scary to me to think these things. What I did know was she was free to do what she may.
To be totally honest in the past I would have probably done m fatherly duties and spend time with the kids. Most of our kids are in college now, I have less demand there. After that I would retire to my room where I would watch a movie or sports. Once I was bored enough I would cruise the internet watch some porn and end up masturbating. Now that I cannot do this without Mrs A permission it changes things. She makes it clear at this point in time she wants to be involved with every orgasm I have.
So last night I played a little gears of war on my xbox and obsessed over Mrs A. I then cleaned the bathroom and the kitchen. I tidy up the dog kennel and then tried to settle in for sleep. It would not come. My mind and routine was gone. I know if I had masturbated I would have been able to sleep. But obeying Mrs A was more important. So sleep finally came at 1 a.m. and it was restless.
I did not know when Mrs A crawled into bed but she was there. Her coffee placed on her night stand, when I left for work. I cannot wait to hear about her night.
Me
Friday, November 6, 2015
Female leadership
I just received a text from Mrs A.
It said : Will you call the city and tell them we will be raking the leaves into the road tomorrow.
I responded to her that I would love too. This simple statement speaks volumes about how things are managed in our life. I get a variety of these kind of statement. They are simple, clear, and direct. Some times there is a please, occasionally I get a thank you, I even see a "would you mind" in there. But the intent is clear.
I have been given a clear way to serve my Domme. I know I will make her happy in doing it. Thus, I am happy. It even makes me smile doing these things. I used to get frustrated with these type of things, but not anymore.
She knows I am on a 5 day run at work. I work 12 hours days that sometimes turn into 15 hours. I am not home much now. She is showing me how she leads by doing. She will be raking. Her and the kids will do this.
She could call or have the kids call. This could all be done without my knowledge. I would not even know they did it since it is dark each night I get home. But by sending me this text she makes me part of it. She makes me serve her. She shows me she is in charge. She makes it clear who leads and who follows.
Mrs A could be a diva. She knows we could have anyone do this for her. Matter fact we have two yard service companies that work for her. She is wanting something taught to me and the kids. It is our duty to find out what that is. Because that is what will make her the most happy.
Me
It said : Will you call the city and tell them we will be raking the leaves into the road tomorrow.
I responded to her that I would love too. This simple statement speaks volumes about how things are managed in our life. I get a variety of these kind of statement. They are simple, clear, and direct. Some times there is a please, occasionally I get a thank you, I even see a "would you mind" in there. But the intent is clear.
I have been given a clear way to serve my Domme. I know I will make her happy in doing it. Thus, I am happy. It even makes me smile doing these things. I used to get frustrated with these type of things, but not anymore.
She knows I am on a 5 day run at work. I work 12 hours days that sometimes turn into 15 hours. I am not home much now. She is showing me how she leads by doing. She will be raking. Her and the kids will do this.
She could call or have the kids call. This could all be done without my knowledge. I would not even know they did it since it is dark each night I get home. But by sending me this text she makes me part of it. She makes me serve her. She shows me she is in charge. She makes it clear who leads and who follows.
Mrs A could be a diva. She knows we could have anyone do this for her. Matter fact we have two yard service companies that work for her. She is wanting something taught to me and the kids. It is our duty to find out what that is. Because that is what will make her the most happy.
Me
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Pegging my way to sub space while slamming into sub drop.
Last night Mrs A surprised me with a very intense pegging session. I was not expecting that since we had an event about a week ago. She was on top of me while we were making out and I wrapped my legs around her. She seemed turned on when I did this. She said "I love how you open yourself to me." " I love you are ready for me anyway I want you." That got her worked up enough she got out her Feeldoe and harness. She stood over me masterbating her self to orgasm while staring me in the eyes. She climb on top and immediately started fucking me. She had a sense of urgency. Face to face we made out. Her intensity was amazing. Her power and hunger so evident to see.
I was overwhelmed. The feeling was so over powering and I welcomed it. I kinda lost time. She kept fucking me until she had me coming. I thought she would stop but she did not. She saw that and got more worked up. She lifted my legs up and started fucking me harder. I kept falling deeper into this loving warm embrace. It seemed to go for a while. I think it was almost an hour long with stops and make out sessions, making me ride her cock on top, bites, slaps,choking, going faster, harder, slower. The second orgasm I do not remember well. I remember her excitement and arousal of it. I remember the "good boy" words being said. It was so lovely to me. I was in a very blissful state.
She has never taken me to that depth. I felt her coming or at least close while fucking me. It was crazy cool. I then, in the moment, said I wanted to help her cum. It was like slamming into a wall while doing 100mph. She stopped. She took that as me trying to control things. She said to me. "Do you think I have not a plan to satisfy my needs." "Do you think I am not doing what pleases me right now." I knew I was in trouble. I crashed so hard I was close to tears. That wonderful inviting place I was in was being pulled away faster than I could handle.
She stood up. She then instructed me to lay flat eyes closed. I was confused. I was unsettled. I think we both missed how deep I went into sub space. She then stood close to my head and put her panties on. She knew I could tell that was what she was doing. She then leaned over me and told me what was "suppose" to happen that night. How I was going to use my mouth, tongue and hands to help her to orgasm after orgasm. But that was closed to me now. She then sat on my face and said this is close as you will get tonight. Then she sat me up. She put me in a one arm choke hold and began to masturbate herself to orgasm after orgasm behind me with her other hand. She would shove her fingers in my mouth as she choked so I could taste her.
After that she laid me in her lap and caressed me and tried some aftercare. I was to lost in all this to figure out where I was. It was an awful feeling, shame, vulnerable, exposed, and it seem to crash over me like the waves of the ocean crashing into a cliff side. She had me suckle at her breast and talked soothing to me. It was not enough. Finally sleep did come. I slept restless waking up many times. Feeling sorrow and at the same time aroused. It was confusing. This morning I still am not sure of my feeling.
Mrs A and I have taken many times today. I got up and worked out in the gym and am at work now. She had me wear matching panties with her today. We will work though this. But it is a crazy ride.
me
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Sexuality and Gender identity
I wonder why gender bending is common in FLR. I should say common for the on line community I visit. I do not doubt that there are many FLR that do not fall under this. But reading many educational sites on FLR they commonly talk about gender role reversal as a way to dominate their men to maintain control. Have them wear panties. Penetrate them verses you. Control his penis and make it your penis.
There are even more aggressive stances. Like never allow him to penetrate you or at least always be in a controlling position. Never let him on top. Tell him to call his penis a clit. Feminizes him to any extreme.
I am one who is very comfortable with these things. I like them and get aroused. I honestly think women panties are more fun to wear and fit better with most clothes... haha
I think for me it was being raised by a single mother. She was my authority person. She was my role model. I also enjoy when Mrs A is playing the "male character" in our sex life. I love the feelings it allows me to feel. I love how it changes my view of her. It is fun for me. Mrs A enjoys it too.
What I am wondering is why? If we think a female is best to lead. That her way is naturally best. Then why are not the natural way a women lives and loves and have sex the best way to maintain control. I would assume that their answer is that this is the part that maintains control by playing into their males fantasy. I do not know. Just fun to think about. I really think social norms dictate to much on gender roles and the more we cloud them out loud to the world the less stigma will be there for all of us. I would say thats a good thing.
I think sexuality deals with similar social stresses. But I find it to be more of a fluid like dynamic. It is fun to think of why some people need to label sexuality. The language we use to talk about these topics naturally labels them. I think we do not have the words to explain them well. But in that limitation it leads to expectations too. Just as on gender identity society then tries to define the norm. I am glad that we have progressed to where many of these labels are not thought of as a medical disease anymore. We still have a long way to go.
I added a link that describes how I view sexuality. I think humans are opportunists. We are in the moment with our sexuality. We can talk all we want about what we label ourselves but in the right setting we are open to much more then what we allow our brain to talk about. Fear of rejection and our own worry over control stands in our way.
vistriai.com/kinseyscaletest/
There are even more aggressive stances. Like never allow him to penetrate you or at least always be in a controlling position. Never let him on top. Tell him to call his penis a clit. Feminizes him to any extreme.
I am one who is very comfortable with these things. I like them and get aroused. I honestly think women panties are more fun to wear and fit better with most clothes... haha
I think for me it was being raised by a single mother. She was my authority person. She was my role model. I also enjoy when Mrs A is playing the "male character" in our sex life. I love the feelings it allows me to feel. I love how it changes my view of her. It is fun for me. Mrs A enjoys it too.
What I am wondering is why? If we think a female is best to lead. That her way is naturally best. Then why are not the natural way a women lives and loves and have sex the best way to maintain control. I would assume that their answer is that this is the part that maintains control by playing into their males fantasy. I do not know. Just fun to think about. I really think social norms dictate to much on gender roles and the more we cloud them out loud to the world the less stigma will be there for all of us. I would say thats a good thing.
I think sexuality deals with similar social stresses. But I find it to be more of a fluid like dynamic. It is fun to think of why some people need to label sexuality. The language we use to talk about these topics naturally labels them. I think we do not have the words to explain them well. But in that limitation it leads to expectations too. Just as on gender identity society then tries to define the norm. I am glad that we have progressed to where many of these labels are not thought of as a medical disease anymore. We still have a long way to go.
I added a link that describes how I view sexuality. I think humans are opportunists. We are in the moment with our sexuality. We can talk all we want about what we label ourselves but in the right setting we are open to much more then what we allow our brain to talk about. Fear of rejection and our own worry over control stands in our way.
vistriai.com/kinseyscaletest/
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
Panties.
Mrs A likes it when I wear panties. She picks them out for me. They will be sitting in my gym bag or set out for me by my work clothes. Occasionally when the mornings are slow she will ask me to model them for her to pick the one she wants that day
She also expects me in chastity with panties. She likes to ask how the lace feels on my skin. Do I think they feel soft. Do you like how they hug your ass. Very specific questions about them to make me feel embarrassed. She also enjoys teasing me in them. She talks of how men would love how my ass looks in them. How aroused they would get. Just like her. She enjoys pegging me on those days. I even see a trend when she is horny to peg me I seem to end up in chastity and panties... lol
She loves to share pics of her panties on those days. It is fun for her in so many ways I had not thought of. She obviously knows I love her doing this to me too. Enjoy a few pics of what I am talking about.
Me
She also expects me in chastity with panties. She likes to ask how the lace feels on my skin. Do I think they feel soft. Do you like how they hug your ass. Very specific questions about them to make me feel embarrassed. She also enjoys teasing me in them. She talks of how men would love how my ass looks in them. How aroused they would get. Just like her. She enjoys pegging me on those days. I even see a trend when she is horny to peg me I seem to end up in chastity and panties... lol
She loves to share pics of her panties on those days. It is fun for her in so many ways I had not thought of. She obviously knows I love her doing this to me too. Enjoy a few pics of what I am talking about.
Me
In my gym bag
Mrs A sharing hers.
me cages and in her favorite panties
Monday, November 2, 2015
3 pump chump all over hockey.
Yesterday, I spent the day cleaning up from the halloween party. Mrs A and I then spent the rest of the day together doing everyday family things. It was a cold windy day. The off and on rain kept us inside. I did not wake up early enough to get Mrs A coffee. But was pleasantly surprised to see her in the dinning room.
She was working at the table. She was standing there looking over some of her work. I hugged her from behind. She immediately reached back and grabbed her cock. Then she put my hands to work on her. She started to grind her ass into my groin as I manipulated her to a couple orgasms. She then stopped thanked me and sent me away.
Later in the day I was in my room and received a nice text from Mrs A. (who was just a couple rooms away) That she needed her cock in her mouth. I was happy to comply. It was at that time we talked of my hockey game that night. She said that I would get a special surprise if I was able to maintain a save percentage greater that 90%.
After the game last night I ended with a save percentage of 87%. It was rather frustrating. So this morning I was allowed to worship Mrs A on our couch in the living room for an hour. Oh ,what punishment!
It is fun for me when she is in that mood. When you can worship long enough all thoughts leave you and you focus 100% on the job at hand. Yes, even to where you forget about that hard cock pushing into the couch. I am not sure how many orgasms she had but each one was amazing.
Mrs A at the end pulled me up on her and started stroking me. She immediately wanted me to cum. Her command was clear "cum for me". I was totally 3 pump chump. The best part was we were both happy about it. It is Mrs A way of seeing if I am in a good sub space. She knows what her attention does to me.
I do want to note that its is fun to see "A married sissy" and "Under contract" duking it out over orgasms. What a great thing to spend your time improving. The orgasm calendar seems like a great idea to me too also.
Me
She was working at the table. She was standing there looking over some of her work. I hugged her from behind. She immediately reached back and grabbed her cock. Then she put my hands to work on her. She started to grind her ass into my groin as I manipulated her to a couple orgasms. She then stopped thanked me and sent me away.
Later in the day I was in my room and received a nice text from Mrs A. (who was just a couple rooms away) That she needed her cock in her mouth. I was happy to comply. It was at that time we talked of my hockey game that night. She said that I would get a special surprise if I was able to maintain a save percentage greater that 90%.
After the game last night I ended with a save percentage of 87%. It was rather frustrating. So this morning I was allowed to worship Mrs A on our couch in the living room for an hour. Oh ,what punishment!
It is fun for me when she is in that mood. When you can worship long enough all thoughts leave you and you focus 100% on the job at hand. Yes, even to where you forget about that hard cock pushing into the couch. I am not sure how many orgasms she had but each one was amazing.
Mrs A at the end pulled me up on her and started stroking me. She immediately wanted me to cum. Her command was clear "cum for me". I was totally 3 pump chump. The best part was we were both happy about it. It is Mrs A way of seeing if I am in a good sub space. She knows what her attention does to me.
I do want to note that its is fun to see "A married sissy" and "Under contract" duking it out over orgasms. What a great thing to spend your time improving. The orgasm calendar seems like a great idea to me too also.
Me
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Halloween done right.
Last night we set up the back yard for halloween movies. We made a scary trail in the yard for trick or treaters to follow to get their surprise. We had tons of kids and families over. It was a wonderful night.
We thought the T rex was the best costume. All the ladies of the house were dressed as purple hair witches.
It was in the low 50's we had a fire and heaters all around. I was able to cuddle into Mrs A lap for the movies under big blankets. I am not one for scary things. She stroked my hair and my back as we watched. Sometimes grabbing my chin to pull it up for a kiss.
What a halloween night! Hope yours was just as fun.
Me
We thought the T rex was the best costume. All the ladies of the house were dressed as purple hair witches.
It was in the low 50's we had a fire and heaters all around. I was able to cuddle into Mrs A lap for the movies under big blankets. I am not one for scary things. She stroked my hair and my back as we watched. Sometimes grabbing my chin to pull it up for a kiss.
What a halloween night! Hope yours was just as fun.
Me
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)